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Jun. 26th, 2007 12:13 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
same_differenceAnd anyone who doesn't read the reports board.
Lucien's report, warning bad 14th century-esque English and specific humour to follow.
Delivered in Report to Guards and copied to the Temple of Freedom
Book Primus
Chapter the first, How Lucien did go unto the town of Dunwich, and form enfellowship with those he met, and what they didst ken
Inst the days of the Baron Van Huesen, of the year 107AE, there was a warrior of the Prince's Men who doth served him that hight Lucien the Swaeger, and hadst been given the title of Lance-Corporal. And Lucien was a goodly warrior yet of little renown, who hadst ventured forth in his lords name, thrice hence. And this Van Huesen didst control a just and bounteous land, and many were the miscreants, fell creatures and beasts that fell uponst it and didst wish to bring it unto ruin and takest its bounty for themselves. It was inst this manner, that the town of Dunwich had met threat and the Mayor Whateley of Dunwich hadst sent a call for warriors goodly and worshipful to lay the threat to rest. Thus did Lucien take the call, and he didst don harness and garb, ast a warrior, and gat a good sword and shield, and travel to this Town of Dunwich, whilst he granted his goodly squire a day of rest. Upon arrival he doth make enfellowship with those others who dost take up the call. And they didst include Tanner the Stalwart, a goodly leech and warrior strong to dure, who wast sworn to preserve, so god help him, who hadst also been granted the title of Lance-Corporal of the men of Baron Van Huesen, the Prince, and the King on distant shore. And there wast Archer the Righteous, a goodly paladin, who dost protects the week, so god help him. And too wast there the Lady Pheonix of the Flame, caller of the Elemental Fire, and sorcerer of greate power. Andst there was the goodly leeches Juilin Fortrayne oft the Rainbow, and Holster oft the Red Mist, both wise men and seekers of greate truth. And the wench Traci, of foul wyrmling tongue, who dost bring goodly men low and whost countenance ist likest a plague upon the land, and who wore a hair piece, wast not among the goodly warriors, and so did Lucien greatly rejoice.
Chapter the second, how they didst venture forth in enfellowship unto the village, and didst encounter beasts driven unto a rage by fell magicks
And lo did the Mayor of Dunwich, inform unto them, that the woods didst harbour miscreants who werst oft the call of nature and oft the taint of death and hadst threatened the village. And also they werst seekers of great knowledge, who didst rend the earth in search of forgotten truths who hadst pight their camp upon the forests far edge, and of whos number one had been sent forth to pass on message and had been struck down by the fell creatures within. And they werest to deliver a book of magics both known and not ken. And itst fell that Lucien the Swaeger wast a Man of the Prince for the greatest time, and so wast to leade the goodly warriors hence. And so didst the enfellowship form to venture forth and entreat the village, and Lucien spake and bid Holster hide the book amongst his person lest some ruffian spy and away with it hence. And the Lady of the Flame, Pheonix, didst embue their weapons and dress them unto raiment oft flame so theyst may battle with the strength of sorcery inst their arms. They dost travelled until the village dost came in sight, and it were filled with many a woman of wagging toungue, and lead by a man fallen unto drink. Yet the goodly warriors did spake unto them, and learnst of the nature of the land, and prize from them the truths that they sort. And so enfellowship didst they approach the forest, and afore them were the beasts of the woods, filled with greate malice. And they didst set upon them, and strikest them down on the left hand and on the right hand, and yet the beasts did not retreat. And thy warrior Lucien's fine raiment meant thy beasts could not cause him hurt, and so withst the strength of Tanner the Stalwarts god he set upon them and there wast greate slaughter among there number.
Chapter thirdus, How they didst enter the words, and rescue a woman taken by terror, and return her unto safety
And so they breachest the edge of the forest with great caution ast many a beast couldst hide among the bushement. And they didst find the beasts, but they had met greate slaughter, all scorched and marked with sourcerious fire. And hiding amongst their number was a lady of the flame, who doth pight camp among those who seeketh truth below the grounde and who had ventured forth to bringest worde, only to be set upon by the beasts. And though she had struck them down with passing skill and tongues of flame, hadst been taken in her heart by fear for she knowest know way that wast safe. And so didst the enfellowship entreat to her and calm her, and from her learn of her plight. And the goodly warriors swore unto her her safety and escorted her back to the Village.
Chapter quartus, How they didst reenter the forest and there wast much battle with the beasts, and beasts possessed with spirits and the men oft the ward who had called the spirits hence.
Oncest more the fellowship didst breach the forest, and this time didst encounter beasts and men of mal engine, and there wast wolves and bears driven into a rage, and a squirrel possessed with a spirit of flame. And so ist they did set upon them, but the good warrior Lucien spirit wast broken by fell sorcerery of death, and he fled until Holster of the Red Mist removed the curse cast by the disworshipful man of the
wood. And so ist did Lucien fall once more upon them, and they couldst not pierce his fine raiment, and he did smote them utterly for his body was given strength by Tanner the Stalwant, his spirit fortified by Juilin oft the Rainbow, and his sword did sing with the flames of the Lady Phoenix. Andst so dist they push on through the wood, and they didst battle with daemons of great many nature, and they were disworshipful miscreants who didst taunt them, and many who called fell sorcery upon the fellowship which didst weaken there body, and attackest there minds. And on and on they pushed, even thoughest they grew weary, and the leeches godly power wast waning, bringing greate slaughter on the left hand and the right hand till the wood itself was overbled with blood.
Chapter Quintus, How the fellowship did rest under the watchful guard of Lucien
And so didst the brave and worshipful fellowship didst battle until they had driven all beasts and men and daemons from their countenance. And thy goodly leeches tending the wounds for they were minor, but a greate many in nature, till all were hale and hearty again. And so ast the wood paused did Lucien spaketh unto them oft their victory and passing skill and worshipfulness to fill their hearts with pride at their great victory, and lift their weary spirits. And he dost bid them rest and speaketh unto their gods, or for the Lady of Flame refresh her will, for he sworest that naught harm shall come unto them, even if he shouldst be overwhelmed and struck down. And whilst they rested did the goodly warrior Lucien dost watch the ways of the forest, and he saw the birds still about their business and he rejoiced for the fell sorcery of daemons didst not hold full sway. And once there werest refreshed did, the Lady Pheonix call upon the elemental flame, and whilst she didst so Lucien spied a skulk atop a yonder rise and did spake unto the fellowship thusly.
Chapter Sextus, How the fellowship fell upon a greate den of miscreants and their guards of plant, and of battle filled with the sorceress malengine of the death in nature
And so did they strive mightly up the slope and before them didst they see a greate many in fell miscreants and men of nature in greate number. Andst for their guard didst the very plants walk and wield their branches as weapons. And so didst the enfellowship fall among them, but their sorcery wast greate and they didst strike the minds of Tanner the Stalwart with greate fear, undo the blessings of the Lady Phoenix, bringest the very plants to pull the fellowship from their feet and causest the stout sword and shield and fine rainment oft Lucien to fall asunder. But it didst not aswage him and he rallied hist men unto him, and he doft strove mightily against all his foes, and he did lay about him with much wrath thoughest they struck at him, and pulled him unto his knees, ast didst all the fellowship, till all miscreants had been slaine or had fled from the fellowships wroth.
Chapter Septus How they didst espy the miscreants camp, their circle of deamonic magicks and slay the fell troll who wast possessed by a deamon of cruel and unusual strength
And they didst press on to take the high ground, following the paths the fell miscreants had taken, and they didst slay more men of the wood and another beast, a badger filled with flame and possessed by a great daemon. And so did they enter unto a valley and it was filled with daemons and foul men of all taint, and they did strive mightly among them, and drivest onwards unto their camp, for Lucien hast been strengthened with all the powers of the gods and the Lady Phoenix, and none couldst harm him even thoughest they smote his raiment asunder. And so didst they aspy the camp and amongst it were heathen chanting and greate wailing, and miscreants and demons and fell creatures oft all ken, even a woman who body was as cloud, and the greatest among them was a fell troll of greate strength whost spirit wast imbued and possessed by a daemon of equal power. And so did Lucien send Tanner the Stalwart to break the fell circle of magick, while he fell upon the troll with full wroth, and the others did slay those who gathered there. But the Troll wast greate in strength, and though Lucien's raiment was strong and his body fast, his mind hadst been brought low by a fell deathly taint and he couldst not bring himself to full avoidest its blows. But still he fought it and it doth strike down some twenty and two times till he couldnst no longer stand, and the goodly warriors Tanner and Juilin did heal him and then they did fall upon the troll with full wroth. A ruffianly miscreant didst steal Lucien's fine sword whilst he lay upon the ground in harm, and he rose and did stride forth mightly to reclaim it, and heard the cries as a fell sorcerer had brought the Lady Pheonixs flames back against her striking her to the ground, and breaking her form, but it didst not slay her. And whilst Tanner and Juilin didst battle ever against the great troll, Lucien though not armed did bringst the wroth of the fell foes upon himself, allowing Holster to summon forth the red mist where once they did lie their head. And it wast Archer who dost provide him with blade and he did stride mightly and in full haste towards the greate troll, and as he arrived Tanner and Julian did slay it finally, bringing greate worship unto themselves. Archer had captured a fell miscreant, a woman who spake naught but lies. And three times did they give her chance to remain peaceful inprisonment among them, and three times did she bidst escape, and it was with greate dole that Lucien did pronounce her dead for her crimes, and her head was collected and her body destroyed so that she couldst be returned to life, and speak the truths she hid under investigation. And yet more daemons did fall amongst them, but the fellowship were strong in spirit and did slay them and sunder them utterly.
Chapter Octus How they didst fall upon the last of the demons with much slaughter and spy the camp with caution.
And so the enfellowship though weary from battle, the godly powers and the Lady Phoenix's magicks both waning, didst strive on for the camp they hadst been sent to entreat, the book of magicks still hidden withst Holster. And upon the pathe they didst encounter demons who dost guard the forest from intrusion accross it's far edge. And the enfellowship fell upon them and slew them utterly for they wouldst suffer no feel creatures within their sight. And the fellowship did leave the woods, and Lucien did spake unto them once more to fill their spirits with courage lest the camp itself be overrun. And so weret they entreated with a warrior oft the sword and the arm, who dost had an interest in things outside the arena, and were led among them to the camp where they had rent the earth apart in their searching. And Lucien bid Juilin to doth speak unto them and check their minds for the fell taint of the daemons couldst be hidden, but they were pure and fine. And so didst the fellowship espy the ruins of an ancient temple to the just, and upon it the signs of the daemons as hast been bound and caged within its walls. And so didst they pass over the book, and complete their quest, each earning worship for their pure hearts, and unyielding bravery in the dangers of the day. And they didst return to the town of Dunwich, wherest Lucien didst reward his goodly and true men, and the fine Lady, with drink and rest, and there was much celebration.
Thanks again tobaloonworld for doing the originals for Oolong, allowing me to steal phrases and words as required.
Lucien's report, warning bad 14th century-esque English and specific humour to follow.
Delivered in Report to Guards and copied to the Temple of Freedom
Book Primus
Chapter the first, How Lucien did go unto the town of Dunwich, and form enfellowship with those he met, and what they didst ken
Inst the days of the Baron Van Huesen, of the year 107AE, there was a warrior of the Prince's Men who doth served him that hight Lucien the Swaeger, and hadst been given the title of Lance-Corporal. And Lucien was a goodly warrior yet of little renown, who hadst ventured forth in his lords name, thrice hence. And this Van Huesen didst control a just and bounteous land, and many were the miscreants, fell creatures and beasts that fell uponst it and didst wish to bring it unto ruin and takest its bounty for themselves. It was inst this manner, that the town of Dunwich had met threat and the Mayor Whateley of Dunwich hadst sent a call for warriors goodly and worshipful to lay the threat to rest. Thus did Lucien take the call, and he didst don harness and garb, ast a warrior, and gat a good sword and shield, and travel to this Town of Dunwich, whilst he granted his goodly squire a day of rest. Upon arrival he doth make enfellowship with those others who dost take up the call. And they didst include Tanner the Stalwart, a goodly leech and warrior strong to dure, who wast sworn to preserve, so god help him, who hadst also been granted the title of Lance-Corporal of the men of Baron Van Huesen, the Prince, and the King on distant shore. And there wast Archer the Righteous, a goodly paladin, who dost protects the week, so god help him. And too wast there the Lady Pheonix of the Flame, caller of the Elemental Fire, and sorcerer of greate power. Andst there was the goodly leeches Juilin Fortrayne oft the Rainbow, and Holster oft the Red Mist, both wise men and seekers of greate truth. And the wench Traci, of foul wyrmling tongue, who dost bring goodly men low and whost countenance ist likest a plague upon the land, and who wore a hair piece, wast not among the goodly warriors, and so did Lucien greatly rejoice.
Chapter the second, how they didst venture forth in enfellowship unto the village, and didst encounter beasts driven unto a rage by fell magicks
And lo did the Mayor of Dunwich, inform unto them, that the woods didst harbour miscreants who werst oft the call of nature and oft the taint of death and hadst threatened the village. And also they werst seekers of great knowledge, who didst rend the earth in search of forgotten truths who hadst pight their camp upon the forests far edge, and of whos number one had been sent forth to pass on message and had been struck down by the fell creatures within. And they werest to deliver a book of magics both known and not ken. And itst fell that Lucien the Swaeger wast a Man of the Prince for the greatest time, and so wast to leade the goodly warriors hence. And so didst the enfellowship form to venture forth and entreat the village, and Lucien spake and bid Holster hide the book amongst his person lest some ruffian spy and away with it hence. And the Lady of the Flame, Pheonix, didst embue their weapons and dress them unto raiment oft flame so theyst may battle with the strength of sorcery inst their arms. They dost travelled until the village dost came in sight, and it were filled with many a woman of wagging toungue, and lead by a man fallen unto drink. Yet the goodly warriors did spake unto them, and learnst of the nature of the land, and prize from them the truths that they sort. And so enfellowship didst they approach the forest, and afore them were the beasts of the woods, filled with greate malice. And they didst set upon them, and strikest them down on the left hand and on the right hand, and yet the beasts did not retreat. And thy warrior Lucien's fine raiment meant thy beasts could not cause him hurt, and so withst the strength of Tanner the Stalwarts god he set upon them and there wast greate slaughter among there number.
Chapter thirdus, How they didst enter the words, and rescue a woman taken by terror, and return her unto safety
And so they breachest the edge of the forest with great caution ast many a beast couldst hide among the bushement. And they didst find the beasts, but they had met greate slaughter, all scorched and marked with sourcerious fire. And hiding amongst their number was a lady of the flame, who doth pight camp among those who seeketh truth below the grounde and who had ventured forth to bringest worde, only to be set upon by the beasts. And though she had struck them down with passing skill and tongues of flame, hadst been taken in her heart by fear for she knowest know way that wast safe. And so didst the enfellowship entreat to her and calm her, and from her learn of her plight. And the goodly warriors swore unto her her safety and escorted her back to the Village.
Chapter quartus, How they didst reenter the forest and there wast much battle with the beasts, and beasts possessed with spirits and the men oft the ward who had called the spirits hence.
Oncest more the fellowship didst breach the forest, and this time didst encounter beasts and men of mal engine, and there wast wolves and bears driven into a rage, and a squirrel possessed with a spirit of flame. And so ist they did set upon them, but the good warrior Lucien spirit wast broken by fell sorcerery of death, and he fled until Holster of the Red Mist removed the curse cast by the disworshipful man of the
wood. And so ist did Lucien fall once more upon them, and they couldst not pierce his fine raiment, and he did smote them utterly for his body was given strength by Tanner the Stalwant, his spirit fortified by Juilin oft the Rainbow, and his sword did sing with the flames of the Lady Phoenix. Andst so dist they push on through the wood, and they didst battle with daemons of great many nature, and they were disworshipful miscreants who didst taunt them, and many who called fell sorcery upon the fellowship which didst weaken there body, and attackest there minds. And on and on they pushed, even thoughest they grew weary, and the leeches godly power wast waning, bringing greate slaughter on the left hand and the right hand till the wood itself was overbled with blood.
Chapter Quintus, How the fellowship did rest under the watchful guard of Lucien
And so didst the brave and worshipful fellowship didst battle until they had driven all beasts and men and daemons from their countenance. And thy goodly leeches tending the wounds for they were minor, but a greate many in nature, till all were hale and hearty again. And so ast the wood paused did Lucien spaketh unto them oft their victory and passing skill and worshipfulness to fill their hearts with pride at their great victory, and lift their weary spirits. And he dost bid them rest and speaketh unto their gods, or for the Lady of Flame refresh her will, for he sworest that naught harm shall come unto them, even if he shouldst be overwhelmed and struck down. And whilst they rested did the goodly warrior Lucien dost watch the ways of the forest, and he saw the birds still about their business and he rejoiced for the fell sorcery of daemons didst not hold full sway. And once there werest refreshed did, the Lady Pheonix call upon the elemental flame, and whilst she didst so Lucien spied a skulk atop a yonder rise and did spake unto the fellowship thusly.
Chapter Sextus, How the fellowship fell upon a greate den of miscreants and their guards of plant, and of battle filled with the sorceress malengine of the death in nature
And so did they strive mightly up the slope and before them didst they see a greate many in fell miscreants and men of nature in greate number. Andst for their guard didst the very plants walk and wield their branches as weapons. And so didst the enfellowship fall among them, but their sorcery wast greate and they didst strike the minds of Tanner the Stalwart with greate fear, undo the blessings of the Lady Phoenix, bringest the very plants to pull the fellowship from their feet and causest the stout sword and shield and fine rainment oft Lucien to fall asunder. But it didst not aswage him and he rallied hist men unto him, and he doft strove mightily against all his foes, and he did lay about him with much wrath thoughest they struck at him, and pulled him unto his knees, ast didst all the fellowship, till all miscreants had been slaine or had fled from the fellowships wroth.
Chapter Septus How they didst espy the miscreants camp, their circle of deamonic magicks and slay the fell troll who wast possessed by a deamon of cruel and unusual strength
And they didst press on to take the high ground, following the paths the fell miscreants had taken, and they didst slay more men of the wood and another beast, a badger filled with flame and possessed by a great daemon. And so did they enter unto a valley and it was filled with daemons and foul men of all taint, and they did strive mightly among them, and drivest onwards unto their camp, for Lucien hast been strengthened with all the powers of the gods and the Lady Phoenix, and none couldst harm him even thoughest they smote his raiment asunder. And so didst they aspy the camp and amongst it were heathen chanting and greate wailing, and miscreants and demons and fell creatures oft all ken, even a woman who body was as cloud, and the greatest among them was a fell troll of greate strength whost spirit wast imbued and possessed by a daemon of equal power. And so did Lucien send Tanner the Stalwart to break the fell circle of magick, while he fell upon the troll with full wroth, and the others did slay those who gathered there. But the Troll wast greate in strength, and though Lucien's raiment was strong and his body fast, his mind hadst been brought low by a fell deathly taint and he couldst not bring himself to full avoidest its blows. But still he fought it and it doth strike down some twenty and two times till he couldnst no longer stand, and the goodly warriors Tanner and Juilin did heal him and then they did fall upon the troll with full wroth. A ruffianly miscreant didst steal Lucien's fine sword whilst he lay upon the ground in harm, and he rose and did stride forth mightly to reclaim it, and heard the cries as a fell sorcerer had brought the Lady Pheonixs flames back against her striking her to the ground, and breaking her form, but it didst not slay her. And whilst Tanner and Juilin didst battle ever against the great troll, Lucien though not armed did bringst the wroth of the fell foes upon himself, allowing Holster to summon forth the red mist where once they did lie their head. And it wast Archer who dost provide him with blade and he did stride mightly and in full haste towards the greate troll, and as he arrived Tanner and Julian did slay it finally, bringing greate worship unto themselves. Archer had captured a fell miscreant, a woman who spake naught but lies. And three times did they give her chance to remain peaceful inprisonment among them, and three times did she bidst escape, and it was with greate dole that Lucien did pronounce her dead for her crimes, and her head was collected and her body destroyed so that she couldst be returned to life, and speak the truths she hid under investigation. And yet more daemons did fall amongst them, but the fellowship were strong in spirit and did slay them and sunder them utterly.
Chapter Octus How they didst fall upon the last of the demons with much slaughter and spy the camp with caution.
And so the enfellowship though weary from battle, the godly powers and the Lady Phoenix's magicks both waning, didst strive on for the camp they hadst been sent to entreat, the book of magicks still hidden withst Holster. And upon the pathe they didst encounter demons who dost guard the forest from intrusion accross it's far edge. And the enfellowship fell upon them and slew them utterly for they wouldst suffer no feel creatures within their sight. And the fellowship did leave the woods, and Lucien did spake unto them once more to fill their spirits with courage lest the camp itself be overrun. And so weret they entreated with a warrior oft the sword and the arm, who dost had an interest in things outside the arena, and were led among them to the camp where they had rent the earth apart in their searching. And Lucien bid Juilin to doth speak unto them and check their minds for the fell taint of the daemons couldst be hidden, but they were pure and fine. And so didst the fellowship espy the ruins of an ancient temple to the just, and upon it the signs of the daemons as hast been bound and caged within its walls. And so didst they pass over the book, and complete their quest, each earning worship for their pure hearts, and unyielding bravery in the dangers of the day. And they didst return to the town of Dunwich, wherest Lucien didst reward his goodly and true men, and the fine Lady, with drink and rest, and there was much celebration.
Thanks again to
baloonworld for doing the originals for Oolong, allowing me to steal phrases and words as required.
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