same_difference | On a seperate note

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On a seperate note

Yesterday failed spectacularly as I managed to miss the start of the larp, and hit a brick wall of voicemails when I tried to contact people. Unfortunately since I had flu sleeping in has become a bit too easy, which for me is saying something.

On the plus side I managed to wrangle an

almosthonest for a couple of hours today, it was excellent. I do not envy the business he has to deal with, though I can definitely sympathise when it comes to his pending house renovation. I've cunningly leant him a book, ensuring I'll have to see him again at some point to get it back off him...

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Out of interest, did you delete your boards post? I only heard about it rather than getting to read it, you see.

No it got deleted as I'd stuck it on the temporary sign up thread.

The summary was a hopefully polite message saying: ran late, tried texting GM, needed second person for Cumberlanding up. Would appreciate GM's checking phones/checking with me if I signed up to turn up and haven't appeared as expected in future.

See I can't guarantee I won't be running late, but I will always try to keep people informed.

I texted at 11:45, estimated 12:30 arrival and I got there about 12:45-12:50, how much did I miss the start by?

I know from the time-stamp on my phone (in a car) that you missed us by at least 15 minutes, and you managed to put the back up on pretty much everyone there with the post, either from direct reading or summary form.

To say I'm annoyed at you wouldn't cover how many times I've written comments and deleted them because I'm trying not to snap at you.

That's not good.

I even ran it by Rachael to check it wasn't rude. I'm very sorry.

I deleted it whilst updating the boards. It had already been read by at least one GM, I had confirmed, so the message had been communicated.

That was the assumption (the why rather than the who), given Dom hadn't deleted it himself. The question was meant more as an approximate attempt at a neutral opening gambit for the conversation which has since been finished offline.

I think it may be worthwhile my asking (in lieu of saying anything else) if there is there something I am not aware of that keeps you from arriving earlier? Do you have work or personal commitments that you have to attend to before you can head up to campus?

I generally aim to arrive for 11:30 to 12:00 because if things wake up at a reasonable time, it'll give me a chance to get something useful done in the morning. Sometimes this'll take longer than I think.

There is always the potential for Rachael to have had a bad eczema attack that morning which then takes priority.

There is also a fairly reasonable chance I will sleep through all the alarms, say again for example if Rachael has had a bad night with her skin, or I've just been unusually tired, and I'll simply end up waking up late.

Knowing my predilection for being late and potential for other unforeseen circumstances, I make a point of always keeping people informed of my plans (with some margin of error).

On this basis (and assuming that Rachel does not have an attack, in which case I entirely agree that timing goes out of the window), you are already planning to arrive between thirty and sixty minutes late for the designated 11am meet time, and indeed within thirty and zero minutes of the designated game start time. While this is normally sufficient due to societal apathy, I do not agree that it should be assumed to be the correct course of action. If you have meaningful things to do, that is fine, do them - but on the weekends you are doing them, make arrangements to monster rather than play, so everyone else's game is not held up as a result? There were twenty or so people hanging around - did you propose that we all wait until you were through with what you were doing?

The fact that Cumberland's kit specifically requires help to get into should, surely, mean that you need to arrive even earlier, to make certain that other people will be in a position to help you, and will not be concerned with their own kit/monster briefings?

Furthermore, on finding that the game had started, was there anything stopping you putting your character kit in the car and coming to find the monster crew? Of all things, the decision not to do that, but rather to go home and dress down the GMs, was what caused me the most irritation. It is a horrifying example to set to less experienced players, and I was confused and offended by your choice not to do so.

11am is the designated meet time? Ah for some reason I've had it stuck in my head that the aim was to be there for 12. I can certainly aim to shuffle my plans back by 30 mins to avoid problems in future. As for holding the game up I was aware my running late would cause a delay, but believing that games tend to start about 1pm, it would be minor.

On Sunday, I simply overslept and slept for all three of the alarms I had set. Since having the flu over Christmas, my ability to wake up has gone completely out the window. Had I not overslept my intention was to get their at about 11:30 specifically because the kit needs some help to get on. Having overslept I did my best to keep the GM's informed of my lateness. Unfortunately I didn't realise on arriving at the car park that my first message had been seen, but forgotten in the business of getting the game sorted.

As for just going to find everyone and monster I'm not sure why it didn't occur to me at the time. I guess I was very much stuck in the going to play mindset, and their are impracticalities to carrying the bits of Cumberland's kit that I can't get on myself.

Finally I did not intend to "dress down the GMs". I simply posted that I had tried to communicate my lateness, and made some efforts (though in hindsight not all possible effort) to locate people on arriving. This having failed, I wanted to make it clear to everyone who might run a game in which I have stated my intention to attend that should I be late I will always try to make contact and that to avoid any future communication problems would appreciate people double checking with me because chances are I've already tried to make contact. It was unfortunate that it was miss-interpreted as such, and just clarifies that people clearly know me less well than I thought.

I will never be intentionally rude in an electronic communication, and rarely so in other situations. I will always seek out an ideally face to face conversation, or failing that a phone one if a problem does occur, and my stance is always to make amends and find resolutions that prevent further problems where possible.

Clearly I have efforts to make to get to know people me better so that this isn't something that needs to be explicitly stated in future.

The last time I entered into a discussion of this type it did not go well, and still isn't resolved. Learning from that, it may therefore be better if we meet in person to discuss this, if you would be amenable to it.

I am afraid I cannot agree with your points as they stand, but I am told this is the wrong medium in which to continue.

I'm perfectly happy to have this discussion face to face at the next opportunity.

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On a seperate note

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